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One hell of a week.....

  So, last Friday night Master's car decided that it was going to have what we thought were fuel issues. You know the way a car acts when it's running out of gas? It was doing that only it had an almost full tank. Fun. So monday morning I have mother pick up my kids from my house so Master can take his car in and not have to worry about them getting bored at an auto shop for who know's how long. It's a good thing he has a flexable schedule and can just work 10's for the week to get in his time. Unfortunatly they shop can't get to it that day so they'll give us a call Tuesday. Okay no problem.

  It's Friday night now and I'm about to put the kids to bed. Master and I are going to take a shower together. I guess we'll see what happens after that! Night!
  It's been about a week since my last post, I've been trying to get the house back in order. We had so much stuff left over from the wedding that it took over the house. Not to mention the tons of gifts that I am still trying to find room for. Thanx everyone! :) I have been able to put some stuff in boxes to put in the shed. I am not sure if I should save it or just give it to good will. It is mostly kitchen stuff. It's all still useable, I just now have matching stuff! YAY!

  We have been talking about repainting the kitchen to match our new stuff. I know that we are going to be tearing down and rebuilding but it's not going to be for a few years so I guess we might as well have it look decent.

  I have been trying also to get back to serving my Master properly. But something seems out of place. Missing you could say. I have already talked to Master about it and he says that it's my self confidence. I don't know if that's it or not but I can't shake the feeling that something is not as it should be.

  I don't know. Maybe, I just want more. More time at his feet. More time under his belt. More time serving him and being used. And every time I feel like this I get mad at myself because Master IS using me the way he wants to. Shouldn't that be enough?  Then, I feel guilty. I feel guilty because it's not my place to ask for more. He will give to me what I need as he sees fit and I should be grateful for it. I am, don't get me wrong! I am greatful for everyday that he is my Master and now, my husband as well.  Maybe I'm just being too needy. Maybe I'm just too hard on myself. Maybe I just expect too much from myself. I have never been one to know the meaning of the word relax. I don't know, I'll figure it out eventually.

  Then there is work. I don't want to do it anymore. But if I don't work we won't be able to pay the bills and eat too. Maybe I could find something to do at home to make money. Anyone have any ideas?

  Then I realize that I would go stark raving mad if I had to stay home 24/7 with the boys. They are at a stage now that all they do is fight. Fight with each other, fight with their friends, fight with us. I don't mean that they beat each other up (though they do that too), I mean that everything that they do they end up screaming at each other. I could chalk it up to sibling rivalry but it never stops! Everyone keeps giving me advise but nothing is working. I just want to tie them up and throw them in a closet just to shut them up!

  I'm going to stop whining now.


Jul. 21st, 2008

  It's finally done! Master and I are married and we couldn't be happier! Everything went great with very few hicups. I could have done with out Master's step mother constantly hugging me (quit touching me!!!) and his father getting me with the squirt gun(hair spray,gel and water BAD!). My mother got mad at me cuz I told her to stop being rude but oh well.

  We have TONS of pictures and tons of left over favors. We need to weed out the pictures and do something to do with the favors. Then I need to find places for all of our gifts. YAY for new kitchen stuff!  I have no idea what to do with my bouquet. Maybe I should buy a big tupperware and stick everything in the shed.

  My Dad flew out here from Maryland to walk me down the isle.  I think that out of everything that we got or everything that everyone else did, that ment the most to us. He didn't get to do it the first time. I think it made him happy. I know my step mother was. I know I am.

  Master's parents paid for one night at a hotel for us and we got enough cash from people that we had enough for another night. It was so nice not to have to worry about anything except what to eat! The first night we got there we opened the basket that Master's sister made for us. There was stuff to eat (candy,crackers,cookies, cheese and salami) and stuff to drink. We had a snack and died.

 We went and saw Dark Knight with some friends the next day and then went to and italian resturant for dinner afterward. When we got back to the hotel I gave Master a sugar scrub foot rub and a back massage with one of thoes hand held massagers with coconut body wash. I don't think he's had a "proper" bath in ages.

  We got home today around noon. Masters sister had our boys. Her and her hubby took them to Wild Waves on Sunday. They had a blast! I guess they went on every single ride that they could. My youngest was only told that he couldn't go on one ride due to his size. He was thrilled! He's never been able to go on very many rides. I am glad that they had fun.

  So I am going to leave you with a picture and go serve my Master before we go to bed for the night. Sweet dreams!



  I haven't written a word for about a week or so. I'm sure I'll get in trouble for it later.

  I'm tired and sad and I want this week to be over with. Apparently I have pissed some people off and no one has bothered to tell me to my face, I don't even know what I did. The person who told me about it is going to have them call me, or something. She told me that no one wanted to make me upset before my wedding. Whatever, I would rather know now than later.

  Also I was told that no one wants my youngest at their house because he is out of control. Um.....why didn't anyone tell me this!? If I don't see something then I can't do anything about it. I don't expect anyone to parent my kids for me but if they are doing something wrong and I'm not there to see it then I need to be told so I can. But at least now I know why people haven't been calling us to go do things like they used to.

  I fucked up my foot at work and now I don't know if I am going to be able to wear my shoes that I bought for the ceramony. I can walk on it with little to no pain but my whole foot is swollen. The brusing I have is going away rather quickly because of the anti bruise ointment that I have but the swelling is getting worse. I know I didn't break it because I wouldn't be able to walk at all without pain. I don't really think it's sprained either. Only one side of my ankle is swollen. It's weird. I don't even really have a limp.

So now I am going to go put my foot up and sleep. Hope you all have a good night.


Jul. 9th, 2008

10 more days.

Dress is made. Just need to get fitted.

Vows are written.

Bouquets are made.

 Boutonnieres are made.

Shoes for me have been bought.

Food is being bought.

Got to get tables from work.

Need to get outfits for boys.

Need to get shoes for Master.

Need to get license.

Need to hang the next person that asks me something and then tells me that it can't be done that way.


Jul. 5th, 2008

  Master and I went to Oregon to see some friends for the 4th. We took the kids with us and had our first ever family trip. We went a day early because we didn't want to hit the holiday traffic and be pissy when we got there. We got there much, much later than we had planned due to some miscomunication with our dog sitters but the drive went very well once we got going.

  We got home about 8:30 pm, unloaded the car, let the boys play a bit, greeted our poor neglected puppys (yeah right) went to the store to get some pizza and now it's 12:30 am and I am beat. It was a good mini vacation. I think I'm going to go to bed now. Have a good one and please excuse my spelling errors. I hate editing when I'm tired!
  21 more day to go until I can STOP thinking all girly! I mean, planning our wedding, has brought the girl out in me so much so that whenever we go to look at wedding stuff Master makes fun of me.

  I am not a girly girl. Not that there is anything wrong with being one. I just am not. I don't wear dresses on a regular basis. I don't wear any makeup. I don't do my hair and if you try to give me anything pink,  I might just puke on you. But ever since we decided to do the wedding stuff our selves, the girl in me has come out. One of the first thoughts I had when we set our date was, "How am I going to do my hair and make up!?" GAH! GAG! I even agreed to get a manicure and a pedicure! *Faints*

  Anyway! Everything is coming together slowly. We have most everything that we need. We just have to put it together. You know, all those little table toppers, guest treat bags and what not. I began making my bouquet tonight and almost have that done. It doesn't look too bad I guess, Master said that he likes it and that's all that counts in my book. I will start on my MOH's probably Tuesday. I cheated and bought a premade one to toss.  :)

  I have no idea how my dress is going. I have only had one fitting. I do trust her tho. She did after all, make her daughters dress the night before her wedding and it fit perfectly.

  The biggest thing really left to get is the food (which we started to get and put in the deep freezer), drinks and the tables and chairs. We also have to get our sons outfit's but I don't want to do that till the last minute anyway cuz I know if I get them now they will grow out of them just to spite me.

  We are going to go and get Master's ring tomorrow. We were going to use the one he's been wearing but the one I had that matched it, broke. But then I found the one my mother gave me years ago and I never wore in my closet. It's black hills gold with Master's birthstone! Perfect!  So now, we are going to go and try to find one that comes close to matching mine only with my birthstone if possible.

 So now it's 2:15 am and I have to get some sleep. Have a good day everyone and sorry my life has become so vanilla lately! I'm sure (hoping) things get back to normal as soon as the wedding is over.


  I need to post but my head is clogged up and I can't think straight. I swear if I'm getting whatever it is that Master has I'm gonna.........not finish that sentence.

  Is it hot in here or is it just me?

  Master has been sick and last night just as I laid down to sleep he starts blowing his nose, for a very very long time. He gets up and says that he feels a hell of a lot better than he has all week and gets on his computer. So I gave up and got out of bed and tried to get on my computer. I did get it turned on and I did set up my windows but Master had decided that he was going to look at porn. Yup, you got it, I didn't get on my computer. I was already on my knees so he took advantage of it and I got a mouth full while he flipped thru pages and pages of nakedness on line. Then I sent him off to work with a grin and crawled back into bed.

  But I have kids so that didn't happen for very long either.

  Oh well at least Master allowed me to use my plug today.  Maybe sleep will find me tonight. And that is all I'm gonna say tonight.


Jun. 23rd, 2008

   Not in the mood to post much. I was in the hospital Saturday night/ Sunday morning. It's just my back...again. I wasn't sure what to say to the RN when he went to give me my shot that burned like hell and asked why I had brusies in my ass. I thought they were down lower. Oh well. Going back to bed now.


Jun. 18th, 2008

   So, I have been staring at the screen and can't come up with one topic to write about tonight.  I guess that means that I'll have to pick more than one. It seems like all I do lately is complain on here. But oh well. If you don't want to read it, you don't have to.

  I went and returned the cake topper that Master didn't like today and got an archway instead. It'll be good for pictures and it gives a place to walk to for our vows. After that the boys and I went to the dollar store and I found some BBQ tools and some other little things for the wedding. Of course the boys were bugging me the whole time about getting stuff and I think that if I hadn't been watching them the whole store would have ended up in the cart.

  We came home and I tried to get our room in order but because of all the bags of wedding stuff there was no way it was getting done. I had to call Master and ask if he'd stop and get some boxes on his way home. Things look much better now. Or they will when I get done.

  Master surprised me last night with a spanking and nipple clamps. I love my nipples and breasts tortured, so I was drooling after a few minutes of the clamps. We haven't been able to use them till now cuz I got my nipples pierced and had to wait till the healed. It's been awhile since I have had a good hard spanking so it actually made me squirm and apparently yell cuz I ended up with the ball gag firmly in place. When he was done beating me I was flipped over and thoroughly fucked. I didn't get to get off, as I couldn't ask for it and I wasn't sure if Master intended for me to so I didn't. And even though I didn't, I slept like a baby, completely happy.

  The boys are going to Ocean Shores this weekend with one of my aunts and a bunch of my cousin's. Master and I have to stay home due to him having to have oral surgery.  It sucks that our time alone will be with him in pain but at least it's time alone and our kids will get to be with family that they don't get to see very much. They will have fun.

  I got conformation that my Dad and step Mom will be here for our wedding. So it looks like my Daddy will get to give his little girl away after all. My step Mom was the one who insisted that I get a dress (this time) and that's how our "small ceremony" turned into 100 people being invited. I guess they wanted me to do it right this time, and NOT 8 months pregnant.

  Anyways that's all I have for now.